I would like to continue my thoughts on loving well with the following passage.

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.”
Galatians 5:22-23

The above list of virtues is one of the most beautiful depictions of what a human life can and should be. This is what a person who loves well looks like. And while Paul only lists nine virtues here, there are others that he lists elsewhere that could easily go on this list, such as compassion, forgiveness, humility, holiness, eagerness to do good, faith, generosity, and hope.

Interestingly, Paul uses the singular form of the Greek noun for fruit, karpos. I truly believe this is strategic. Rather than listing separate virtues as fruits to pick and choose, he’s saying there is one singular, comprehensive, unified fruit of God’s Spirit. So what is the one fruit of the Spirit? Some would argue that it is Jesus’ character. Others argue that love is the foundational virtue and the remaining virtues are facets of love.

Perhaps it’s both. Jesus invites us to come and learn from him how to be like him. I think it’s safe to say he wants to train us into his full virtuous character so we can live naturally and easily in God’s kingdom. Yet, Paul says that faith, hope, and love are the eternal, enduring virtues, of which love is the greatest. In fact, in that passage, Paul states love is the most excellent way.

So maybe a way to view this is that the single fruit that the Spirit is developing in us is Jesus’s overall character, which encompasses a myriad of interconnected virtues such as love, joy, peace, humility, compassion, etc. And his overall character can be described as love.

Therefore, in order to love well, we must embody all of Jesus’ character — all of his virtues. Remember, love is intending the good for another. It means knowing what is good for that person and being capable to provide what is good.

Think of it this way. Can you love someone without joy? Can you intend the good of another without the pervasive sense of well-being in God? Probably. But not well, especially when joy is the good that is needed.

Can you love someone without humility? Can you intend the good of another without valuing them and their best interest above yourself? Maybe to some extent. But you won’t do it very well if you keep putting yourself first.

We can do this exercise with every virtue. You might be able to provide some level of good to someone, even while being underdeveloped in certain virtues. But whatever might be lacking in you — patience, peace, goodness, holiness, forgiveness — will prevent you from loving well and competently if that virtue is needed for the good of that person.

Remember, love is not an abstract concept. It is real. Love is intending real good for a real person. It requires real wisdom, real time, and real energy. And how you love one person will be very different from how you love another person. Each person will require different facets of love.

When we love someone competently, we need Jesus‘ wisdom to know what is good for that person and we need Jesus’ character and power to deliver what that good. That’s why Jesus is training us into all the aspects of love so we can embody his whole unified character in our lives. Then when a person needs joy or peace or humility or compassion or forgiveness, we can naturally and easily provide it.

We are learning to love well like Jesus because we are being trained by Jesus into everything Jesus is.